First, please watch this short video:
The last 3-4 years have been a living nightmare for me.
Let me back up. In August of 2008, my eldest son was acccepted to University Of Arizona before he even started his Senior year in high school. He's a smart kid . He also played lacrosse all 4 years of high school.
The first semester of his high school senior year he tried pain pills.
Just over 1 year later, after (barely) completeing his freshman year of college he became a heroin IV user. My beautiful boy. A HEROIN ADDICT.
Wait!! This doesn't happen to "people like us"! Parents that love each other and our 2 boys. Well educated parents, excellent income and a nice home. But it did happen and this has been my life for the last 3+ years. That's why you haven't seen me of heard from me for so long. I did fall off the-face of the earth. Many of you know this, since I never kept it a secret. BUT I AM NOT ALONE!!
The pain of loving an addict is so horrible. I watch my son die everyday. My hubby and I have put him through more rehab programs then I can count, but ultimately he has to choose to fight his addiction.
Even if he's sober, we are fucked for life. This disease never goes away, if just gets mannaged.
I can't believe this is my life. My family's life. How did we get here?
Let's talk. Become aware that this can happen to any one of us. Let's not make addiction our "dirty little secret". There is no cure for addiction- it never goes away- it will always be bubbling under the surface of our lives- we will always be worried that the other shoe may drop. But most important, WE ARE NOT ALONE!
Today my son is sober and in jail.
Is this really my life?
I have another blog where I have discussed this journey:
And it totally sucks.